Saudi Gazette

 

We live next door to them, we share the same building and neighborhood; we pass them by every morning and evening as we rush off to and from work. 

 

They have rights over us, and we owe them more than the occasional smile or pleasantries exchanged as we busily get on with our own lives.

They are our neighbors.

 

In every religion, every faith, and belief system, everywhere in the world, from time immemorial, the commandment was one and the same: love thy neighbor.

 

It was mentioned in the Torah, Bible, and Qur’an and is found in Buddhism, Hinduism, and Confucianism.

 

Christians believe that when Jesus was asked of the most important commandments, Jesus replied, “You shall love the Lord with all your heart and with all your soul. You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these.”

 

Kindness to neighbors was preached in Judaism. According to Rabbi Akiva, the commandment to love your neighbor as you love yourself was repeated in the Torah 250 times, to stress its importance.

 

Buddhism teaches that happiness comes from empathizing with others, and from viewing the wellbeing of your neighbor as important as your own.

Islam, like all other religions, placed great emphasis on the love and respect of neighbors. In fact, it is not only encouraged for Muslims to display kind treatment, concern, generosity, and consideration towards neighbors, rather it is their duty.

 

Kind treatment of neighbors is a condition for the acceptance of Muslims’ faith by God Almighty, as is evident in the statement of the Prophet of mercy, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him):

“He who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him be kind to his neighbor; and he who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him show hospitality to his guest; and he who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him either speak good or remain silent.”

 

God reminded Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) again and again and again of the rights of neighbors, until the Prophet (peace be upon him) thought that God would even assign the neighbor a right to the inheritance from one’s wealth.

 

Once, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) instructed his companion, Abu Dharr, “O Abu Dharr! Whenever you prepare a broth, put plenty of water in it, and give some of it to your neighbors.”

 

Be careful, Muslims were warned: do not enjoy good food and go to bed fully satisfied while your neighbor sleeps hungry! Until very recently, this Islamic tradition was maintained in most Muslim cultures; neighbors shared lavishly with one another. 

 

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) also said, “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him not harm or annoy his neighbor.”

 

Harming the neighbor means playing loud music or deciding to drill holes in the wall to hang a painting late at night, or leaving garbage near the neighbor’s door, or violating their privacy. Out of courtesy and respect, we should not permit our children to shout, jump, and play rowdily later on in the evening, or to throw candy wrappers in the hallway or entrance to the building. We can exercise some patience and tolerance if the neighbor occasionally parks his car in our parking space.

 

Good treatment is more than refraining from harm; it includes extending kindness, concern, hospitality, and help. This Islamic tradition has been lost. We can blame our stressful and demanding lifestyles that leave us very little time for a social life. Or we can blame technology; for Eid we now send WhatsApp messages rather than visiting our neighbors and buying them gifts. Another reason is we have distanced ourselves from the teachings of our faith.

 

How many of us know our neighbor’s names? Do we ask about the health and welfare of their children — do we even know how many children they have? When was the last time we invited our neighbors over for a cup of tea and a friendly conversation? When we buy mounds of delicious sweets from the bakery, do we share some with our neighbors? 

 

Did we help in their time of need? We could offer to babysit their children or serve them a homemade dish for dinner or lend them a household item every once in a while.

 

If the neighbor is of a different faith from our own, it is still our duty to treat them with kindness, respect, and thoughtfulness.

 

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) had a Jewish neighbor who used to daily dump foul smelling garbage at the Prophet’s doorstep. The Prophet (peace be upon him) was patient and tolerant, he did not insult his neighbor or seek vengeance. When a whole day went by without the refuse being found at his door, the Prophet (peace be upon him) became concerned that something bad may have befallen his neighbor. He (peace be upon him) visited his neighbor, and indeed the man was sick with a fever, lying in bed.

 

The Prophet (peace be upon him) not only preached kindness, but he also behaved and lived by it.

 

Neighbors, with mutual respect and kind treatment, can be as loving and caring as family.

 

Once, when living in San Francisco, away from my family, my three-month-old colicky baby was wailing for three hours straight. I tried everything I could think of to soothe him but nothing worked. My elderly, Persian neighbor knocked at the door and I thought she was going to complain.

 

 Instead she tenderly showed me how to rub the baby’s tummy with warm olive oil and wrap him in blankets, and it worked! Sometimes she offered to baby-sit so my husband and I could go out for dinner or a movie — it helped maintain my sanity! Several months later when she had knee-replacement surgery, I cleaned her house, did grocery shopping, and cooked for her.

 

In Washington D.C., I had an American neighbor who shared pumpkin pie with me every Thanksgiving, and I shared baklava with her every Eid. In Riyadh, I had a Pakistani neighbor who always invited my son to play with her son. In Jeddah, I had a Saudi neighbor who used to serve us soup and fried sambusa every day of Ramadan. And each Eid, she sent me dates, sweets, and Arabian oil perfume.

 

It is time to bring back to life this tradition, deeply rooted in every faith.