When spouses wish they could press reset

THERE are many couples who get married and then think they deserve better husbands or wives.

November 13, 2014
When spouses wish they could press reset
When spouses wish they could press reset

Renad Ghanem

 


Renad Ghanem

Saudi Gazette

 


 


THERE are many couples who get married and then think they deserve better husbands or wives. Some of them end up divorcing in search for the perfect partner while others feel separation is not the way forward, especially because they have children together.



Ahmed Wagedi, a 31-year-old pharmacist, has been married for seven years. He wishes there could be a reset button in his life. “I feel I got married far too quickly. I rushed into it. I feel I deserve a better woman than the one I’ve currently got,” he said.



“I married in a rush. I was living in Saudi Arabia and had a month to visit my home country. So my mother chose a girl through her friends. I met her and got married that very month. I then returned to the Kingdom and arranged a visa and she followed soon after,” he added.



However, things were not as Wagedi expected them to be. “Everything changed when she came along. She wasn’t the woman that I was expecting. I am a very caring person and I do what I can to provide for my family. The woman I married, however, is careless and lazy. She doesn’t want to do anything at home. She hardly washes my clothes, never cleans the house or even our children. She doesn’t look after our kids the way normal mothers do,” Wagedi said.



“She hardly cooks and when she does it’s absolutely lousy. I don’t want to divorce her for my kids’ sake, but if I could turn the clock back or press a reset button, then I would. I wouldn’t have married her,” he added. “It’s hard for me to say that, but if I could go back in time then I would have definitely searched for a better wife,” he said.



Anoud Muhammed, a Saudi working woman, believes she deserves a better husband and is currently divorcing the one she’s presently married to. “I really deserve a better husband — better in terms of everything, morals and money. My family is of a better status than his — both socially and financially. I knew all of that before I married him but I loved him and thought those differences would not be problematic. But I now see that these are huge problems for me,” she added.



“If I could turn the clock back, I would not marry him. His income is barely sufficient. Before I got married, I would go shopping every week. Now, I only go shopping on occasions. He has a terrible tendency to embarrass me in front of people and always makes fun of me and my job. He also speaks ill of my family,” she said.



“My family has asked me to divorce him and that’s exactly what I am going to do,” she added.



Ola is a Saudi mother of two who feels the same. Most of her family and friends believe she deserves a better husband.



“It’s very tough to be with a person when you know you deserve a lot better.



I myself believe that I deserve a better husband. There are lots of things about my husband that I didn’t know before I married him. I have come to learn that my husband lies to me, has cheated on me many times and treats me like a maid rather than a wife,” she added.



“People consider me friendly and smart. They say that I have a good personality. On the other hand, most of my relatives and friends think my husband is a rough person and rude. It’s very hard for me to live with a man of this nature and it’s very embarrassing,” she said.

 


November 13, 2014
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