Many teachers and psychologists have warned parents against relying too heavily on domestic servants when it comes to taking care of their children, especially in the early stages of childhood.
A number of child experts agree that giving maids the responsibility for raising children will have negative effects on a child’s behavior and development, Al-Riyadh daily reported.
Dr. Abdulrahman Al-Salih, a family counselor and the general supervisor of the Family Development Center in Riyadh, advised parents against using maids to take care of their children.
“A family with little kids who relies heavily on a housemaid is depriving itself of enjoying the feeling of raising a kid and equipping him/her with the important social skills needed at an early age. Let us not forget that such thing will have a negative impact on our children because they will raise to depend on others to get things done for them and attend to their desires and wants,” Al-Salih said.
Frankly speaking, the problem does not lie with housemaids, per se, as much as with families who allow maids to raise children and spend more time with them than mothers.
If a family wants to use a maid, they should let her do household chores while the parents themselves should attend to their children’s needs.
Families should remember that housemaids come to the Kingdom to do a certain job, and it is not their job to take care of children. Housemaids usually come from a different environment, and hold and believe in different traditions and customs.
Simply put, most of them are not qualified to attend to a child, let alone spend extended periods with them. Moreover, they can run out of patience easily with a child, with some possibly using violence against them.
Newspapers have reported many a story where innocent children have become victims of abuse at the hands of unqualified maids, with some children even losing their lives.
Al-Salih called upon families to treat maids kindly and with respect. “Our society prides itself on its ethics and values derived from the Shariah teachings. We should set an example to others when we treat maids,” he said.
Professor of sociology at Imam Muhammad Bin Saud Islamic University, Abdullah Al-Yousif, said over 40 percent of housemaids are entrusted with the care of children while more than 66 percent of Saudi mothers leave their children alone with housemaids that feed and attend to the children.
“This study proves that a maid can play a major and influential role in shaping a child’s personality. Some studies indicated that some mothers leave their children with maids for six and sometimes eight hours a day. The children are bound to be influenced socially and psychologically by maids,” he said.
While it is important to have a driver and a maid for most Saudi families, such reliance should be limited and should not be at the expense of children.
Some maids may suffer from psychological problems whose symptoms may not manifest themselves right away but emerge when they are entrusted with children.
It is easy for a maid who is swamped with too much work at home and under considerably pressure to take it out on children.
