The quote, “We are all products of the five people we hang out with the most”, caught my eye and realized its deep meaning while understanding that it has been an inspiration for me to shape and reshape my world. These words stress that part of our story in life depends on the people who are close to us, and thereby I assume, writing our own story is our responsibility!

Human relations are very important topic to be considered at home, school, workplace and society. The way we interact with others quantifies the success in respect of both personal and professional life. Therefore, I think we have to measure and consider a lot of things while dealing with people around us.

How others see us in their perspective? What the other person {does} and {doesn’t} do towards us, says a lot about us in their point of view. Thus, I always say, in order to measure your value in any relation, you have to count on actions only not words, for this is the way any relation is built. And actually, it’s not a matter of worthiness rather than complex human issues, so, it is really admirable to understand them.

This brings us to understand what is called “Red Flags” of relations, for this modern term usually ties with “Toxic Relations”, the ones that all of us try to avoid having. I can say, the time you realize the red flags in any relations is the time that defines your direction. I can also say that it is the moment of realization and enlightenment in your life.

Some characteristics of this kind of relations, according to my own experiences and reading, is that they will always practice unhealthy habits, sap your energy, let you down constantly and leave you unsatisfied (intentionally or unintentionally).

Other traits include, they will waste your time on unneeded justification, keep you always on waiting mode or not doing things you expect them to do for you. Other bad signs are that they are self-centered, selfish and obviously don’t care enough about your wellbeing, Eventually, in such relationships, endings are probably unpleasant.

On the other hand there are “Healthy Relationships”. I don’t have a great way to put it in words, but simple say, the people in the relationship will add something in our lives, the ones we can count on, while cheering us right up. The course of our relationship with them goes pleasantly, most of the time.

Can you see the difference? Good, then we can control the journey of our self-improvement through the people we choose and remove from our life’s path. The irony of relations is that we cannot define them unless we experience them, and this is part of our growing indeed.

— The writer can be reached on Twitter: @moionlynoor