When Kids Want A Pet

Amal Al-Sibai Saudi Gazette As my three kids were growing up, they had each gone through the phase that all kids go through. You know which phase I’m referring to; wanting a pet so badly that they promise to take care of it, clean their rooms, be responsible, not fight with each other anymore, and many other promises that never really materialize in the end. I guess I should have had enough common sense to know that if it sounds too good to be true, then it probably is. It usually starts off with, “I want a fish.” So we get the fishbowl, colorful rocks, two goldfish, and the special food. Although they were excited in the beginning, the kids gradually lost interest. They stopped coming by the fishbowl and talking to their fish, they even forgot the names that they had picked out for them in the beginning, and they started becoming negligent at feeding the goldfish and routinely cleaning the fish bowl. And of course who is stuck with one more thing to add to her already saturated to-do list but good old Mom? Then their demands progressively increased from “I want a fish” to a turtle, then a canary, parakeet, hamster, cat, snake, monkey, and finally dog. Each time my answer was a loud and emphatic, “No!” As the kids got older, an angry “No” failed to suffice, and my answers had to be more sophisticated. I read articles and books to find all the reasons why I could not handle a pet in the house, ranging from parasites to fleas to time constraints to fear of snakes to financial burden to allergies and everything in between. Honestly, as a parent, it was tough to see that disappointed look on their faces, their smiles turned upside, and the light in their eyes flicker away each time I refused to get a pet. But I still stood my ground. I did not have the time to deal with a pet, I doubted that my kids would be responsible and helpful enough, and I was unaware of the emotional benefits that having a pet in the house could bring the members of my family. So for the most part of their childhood, my kids did not have any loveable pets, except for an electronic pet that my daughter had, and of course all her imaginary ponies, horses, and unicorns. Just as I had thought that the eldest two had grown out of the animal loving phase (the eldest is 18 and the middle one is 14), they came to me with pleading faces. They wanted a cat, or more correctly, they desperately wanted a cat. But this time, they were different in the way they begged and argued. They were prepared. Since they caught me off guard, they already had one point ahead of me; they were using the element of surprise as a tactic in their master plan. And, they were armed with actual studies and scientific evidence that showed that having cats in the home boosted the physical health and emotional wellbeing of the children and adults too. My son showed me the results of a study by researchers at the University of Minnesota’s Stroke Institute. Dr. Adnan Qureshi studied more than 4,000 participants for 10 years: 2,435 were current or former cat owners, while the remaining 2,000 had never had a cat. The researchers found that over a 10 year follow up period, cat owners showed a 30 per cent lower risk of death from heart attack compared to non-cat owners. Pet owners have lower triglyceride and cholesterol levels than those without pets.   “For years we have known that psychological stress and anxiety are related to cardiovascular events, particularly heart attacks,” Dr. Qureshi said. Having pets probably helped to relieve stress. My daughter read me a report by Mayo Clinic in which Jennifer Wickham, licensed professional counselor, said, “Research shows that our desire to connect with our pets can be a valuable asset for those struggling with physical and emotional pain; mental illnesses, such as depression and anxiety; and environmental factors, such as loneliness.” “Though not a replacement for social interaction with people, pets do provide social support and stress reduction,” said Wickham. Studies have also found that playing with a dog or cat can elevate levels of serotonin and dopamine in the brain, which have a calming and relaxing effect. How can you argue with the Mayo Clinic? With teary eyes, my 14-year-old daughter started telling me how lonely she was at school, being the new kid in her school, the only one without a TV at home, and klutzy in sports. She really thought that having a cat could help her cope with the stress that she was facing at school.   To add to their arsenal, my crafty teens dragged the youngest one into this too. She looked at me with her big blue-grey eyes, her hands cupped under her chin as she pleaded. “Last week we had a day when we could bring in our pets to school. Abdullah has a cat and Nora has a bunny. All my friends brought in their pets, and I took my stuffed animal to school! Everyone laughed at me. Mommy, please, I want a cat!” she cried.    How do kids get so good at playing with our emotions? And then the promises started pouring in. They would clean up after the cat, help out more with chores, be responsible, and spend less time on computer games if they had a cat to cuddle, love, and play with! My son, now driving, said that he would take me to the pet store where he had seen a cat that was in need of a home and loving family. I could check it out and talk to the person who worked at the store about my concerns and get more information on what kind of a commitment it would be. No pressure. He held my hand and led me to the cat, her name was Lillian. I put my hand in her cage. She brushed herself against my hand, I took one look at her green eyes, and that was it. The decision was made, I was in love. How did it turn out? Did my kids become the perfect, obliging angels that they promised to become? Of course not, but my son is scrupulous on scooping out Lillian’s litter twice a day, throwing out the trash, and he even started to vacuum the living room, which he has not done since never. My teenage daughter’s acute case of negative attitude has started to subside, she feeds, pats, and caresses Lillian every day, and she does her homework with Lillian curled up in a ball right beside her. The little one loves playing with the cat so much that days go by and she forgets to whine about watching cartoons on my laptop. As for me, I love petting Lillian because when she purrs, it feels like a massage for my soul. And the extra bonus is that there is a lot less yelling and squabbling in the home because the cat gets startled and frightened by loud noises!