Relationships built on benefits

SOCIAL relationships in the past used to be built on love, tolerance and mutual respect. Today, things have changed and most people build relationships for personal gains. Have true friendships really vanished and been replaced with relationships of benefits? Al-Riyadh daily interviewed many people and asked them about the reasons why social relationships are no longer based on love and respect. Nawal Al-Turki, a college student, says mutual benefits govern most social relationships these days. “The true meaning of social relationship does not exist anymore. Rarely one would find a person who can be your friend in need. Society has changed a lot and so have our mutual relationships. It is the bitter reality and we have to accept it. whether we like it or not,” she said. Everyone cares about their own personal interests. Some do not talk to their friends for years to ask about their health and how they are doing but call these friends if they want something from them. People are more careful about who they know. Abdulwahid Al-Matar, a private sector employee, agrees that personal benefits and interests shape today’s human relationships. “There is nothing wrong in having a social relationship with your colleague at work or anyone else for mutual benefit. What is wrong is harming others and depriving them of their rights for personal gains. There are people who get blinded by greed and selfishness and harm others to benefit personally,” he said. Some people are ready to go around the system and use crooked means to achieve their interests from social relationships. These people do not have a shred of morality in them, he said. Al-Matar blamed bureaucratic measures adopted by some public agencies for the spread of this negative mentality, while calling upon parents to instill the values of respect and good behavior in their children’s minds and explain to them the importance of treating people politely and not taking advantage of them. “Money and other personal benefits should not be earned at the expense of others or by using them,” he stressed. Dr. Modi Al-Shammary, associate professor of sociology at King Saud University, said any social relationship should be based on compassion, love and respect, not strictly personal gains. “Nowadays, personal gains govern social relationships among even relatives, which is a sad thing. That is why many people end up having problems with relatives and cut ties with one another as a result of selfishness. Some people do not speak with their relatives unless they want something from them. There always has to be some kind of benefit,” she explained. Unfortunately, society has transformed tremendously due to modernization and globalization. In the past, social relationships were simpler and truer and were based on dedication and mutual cooperation.